Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
