I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Randomize
