people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
