This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
