Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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