Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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