Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(203): View more from Connecticut

these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,

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(802): View more from Vermont

He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.

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(303): View more from Colorado

I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.

(303): View more from Colorado

well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you

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(910): View more from North Carolina

I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.

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(518): View more from New York

I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.

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(217): View more from Illinois

Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak

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(614): View more from Ohio

And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"

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(816): View more from Missouri

I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.

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(678): View more from Georgia

If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.

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