The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Say something about gay babies.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Randomize
