i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
