Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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