Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
