Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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