I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize