ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
