TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
He? As in you personified your dick?
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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