Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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