he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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