why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
