We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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