I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
