when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
