She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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