Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
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There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
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I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
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