She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize
