I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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