Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
