that's an acceptable place to lick
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
His nipple licking is glorious
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