also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
i think im in europe. pls send help
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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