even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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