The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Randomize
