sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
