I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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