If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
