Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
