I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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