I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
