i may or may not be watching the land before time
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
