Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
