He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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