after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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