That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Randomize
