i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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