She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
