you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
