He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize