There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
