We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize