Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
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I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
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