Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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