the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
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